My Life Plan
by Girl who reads
Summary: A chaotic childhood leaves Bella craving routine, despising surprises,desiring control. 10 year old Bella decides to plan her life-everything about her future. When problems arise, will she cling to her plan even if it means her unplanned death?
1. Prologue and Graduation Day

**A/N: In case you receive a new chapter notice I just wanted to let you know that this the same chapter that you already read. I have recently joined with Project Team Beta for story editing so I am going back and updating the posted chapters with the newly updated edits. Nothing has really changed plot wise, mostly correctly comma and typo errors. I am working on chapter 3 and hope to have it ready to go by the time I get chapter 2 back from PTB .**

Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author. The author is in no way associated with the owners, creators, or producers of any media franchise. No copyright infringement is intended.

**My Life Plan**

**Prologue**

"Ugh!" I cannot sleep. "Little one, are you about ready to greet the world?" I absently rub my hand over my abdomen. I probably won't get anymore sleep after she arrives, but hopefully the few hours I do get will be more peaceful. Ha! Peaceful, who am I kidding, but at least this pain will be gone.

"Little one, the doctor says you will be here any day now." I guess I should go to the bathroom since I am awake. It seems that I am constantly in the bathroom these days. I will be glad when this pregnancy is over. Don't get me wrong, I have enjoyed being pregnant. It is indescribable the feeling I get thinking about a new life growing inside me. I have eagerly followed the growth on a website that describes my baby's development each week since I found out I was pregnant. However, the last few weeks I have been miserable: I am fat, tired, hot, achy... like I said, miserable.

I heave a sigh and scoot to the edge of the bed. "Ugh!" I rub my belly as I stand and shuffle to the bathroom. I only make it a few steps when "OH!" Oh my goodness, Oh my goodness! Of course it has to be a night I am alone! Why did I tell Alice I would be okay and send her home?! "Oh goodness!"

OK, calm down, think. We have a plan. Yeah, the plan was not to be alone! OK, not helping...

Deep breath. There is nothing I can do about that now. As my therapist has advised on several occasions, I need to let go and follow the flow. OK, I need to focus and not panic, everything is going to be okay. I _need_ to find the phone!

"Where's the phone?" I frantically chant as I turn towards the nightstand. I quickly locate the phone and push the 2.

"Please pick up... Please pick up..." becomes my mantra.

After two rings "Bella?" the voice on the other end answers.

"I...I think my water just broke. Ugh!"

"OK. Stay calm. I will be there in a few minutes. Remember to breathe," the voice responds calmly with an air of authority before the line goes dead.

"Breathe, Bella." I mentally chant to myself as I head to the closet to get my bag and my "going to the hospital" outfit Alice laid out for me. As quickly as possible I change my clothes and head to the bathroom to brush my teeth. I cannot leave the house without clean teeth. As I hurriedly brush my teeth I stare at my reflection in the mirror. Is there anything else I need to do? No, of course not. The plan stated I only needed to make the one phone call, if I was alone. Everyone else would take care of the rest ... as long as they follow the plan.

"Ugh!" I hope for once everything goes according to the plan.

**Chapter 1 – Graduation Day**

"Bells! Are you about ready?" Charlie hollers from the kitchen. "Alice'll be here any minute."

"Yeah Dad. I'll be down in a minute," I answer back. I take a final look in the mirror and grab the cap and bag off my bed before heading down the stairs. Just as I make it to the bottom step, there is a knock at the door. Before Charlie or I can get the door, in bounds a 5 foot even bundle of energy, better known as my best friend Alice.

"Hey Charlie!" Alice waves to him as she turns to me, "So, Bella, are you ready?"

"Yeah, let me just grab my gown." I turn towards the living room where my graduation gown is hanging from the door frame.

"Where's Edward?" Charlie inquires.

"Oh, the Valedictorian and Salutatorian had to get to school early for last minute speech practice," Alice replies.

"I think it is more so they don't try to sneak in any inappropriate remarks at the last minute," I comment with a wink in Alice's direction. Alice immediately begins giggling as she remembers the graduation ceremony from two year ago.

Charlie cocks an eyebrow but does not comment on our giggle fit. "Bells, you two better get going. I'll see you at the ceremony."

"Ok, Dad," I give him a quick hug, "and you are coming to the party at the Cullens' house afterward, right?"

"Yes, I will be there."

Alice and I wave goodbye as we head out to her car.

Ten minutes later we pull into the parking lot of Forks High. Many of our fellow classmates are milling around, chatting with one another. We catch sight of Edward and wave. He starts towards us, but is intercepted by Jessica and Lauren. "You would think that after four years they would take the hint that he is not interested in them," I hiss to Alice as we head off to rescue Edward once again.

"You would think, but then again they are at the bottom of the class," Alice giggles.

I give her a confused look before asking, "Alice you do know only the top 10 are seated by class standing, right? Everyone else is seated in alphabetical order."

"Yes, silly," she affirms. "Why else would I be sitting after Tyler Crowley?" She questions, wrinkling her nose. "I just might have been in the guidance office when they printed the graduation roster, which happened to be in order of class standing," she whispers conspiratorially.

I roll my eyes. Everyone thinks she is psychic, but I know she is just sneaky.

"...it will be a great party, especially if you stopped by, Eddie," we hear Lauren's falsely sweet voice saying as we approach Edward.

Jessica is the first to notice us. "Oh, my gosh! Can you believe we are finally graduating?" She squeaks as she hugs me tightly before hugging Alice.

Lauren glares at us briefly before turning back to Edward, "Hope to see you tonight!" She winks and walks haughtily away with Jessica, leaving the three of us gaping at her back. We turn to each other and burst into a fit of laughter.

After calming down slightly I ask, "So what was that all about?"

Edward pinches the bridge of his nose and groans, "The usual thing."

I laugh again, reaching up to hug him around the neck. "I know you are excited about graduating for no other reason than to get away from them."

He laughs briefly, hugging me back tightly and giving me a quick kiss on the cheek before releasing me. "I guess Jacob isn't here yet," he states rather sourly.

"No," I reply dryly. "And even if he was, friends are allowed to greet one another, you know."

"Yeah," he retorts. "I think Jacob has a different opinion on what _you_ are allowed to do."

I open my mouth to argue, but Alice cuts me off.

"So Edward, how did speech practice go? Did you pass inspection?"

"Ha Ha! We were given a lecture on what are appropriate remarks and how badly inappropriate comments reflect upon our reputation."

"I am sure the principal gives that speech every year," I attempt to placate him.

"Yeah, well I think it was directed more at me than Ben this year. I mean, really, he didn't even glance in Ben's direction during the entire lecture," whined Edward.

"You know what they say about the company one keeps," I tease.

There is an announcement over the PA system telling all the graduates to line up outside the gym; the ceremony is about to begin.

Alice squeals and helps me put on my cap and straightens my gown. While Alice proceeds to finish with her cap and gown, I scan the parking lot. I see Charlie's police cruiser and Jacob's Rabbit. I quickly scan again to see if there are any rental cars in the lot.

"Maybe they got a ride with Charlie," Edward whispers softy in my ear with a hand on my shoulder, guiding me toward the front of the line.

I shake my head whispering back, "Phil said mom isn't adjusting well to the new medication."

He gives me a small smile and looks like he is about to say something when we hear the first notes of the music indicating the ceremony is starting. We begin filing into the gym where all of our friends and family are standing in honor of us, the graduating class of Forks High.

I groan slightly when I glimpse the stairs heading to the stage.

"Don't worry, Bella, I'll be right in front of you to catch you should you fall," Edward smirks, probably remembering the disaster at graduation practice yesterday or any number of times that I attempted to make friends with the floor over the years.

The ceremony goes quickly. Edward and Ben give their speeches and our names are called to accept our diplomas. Luckily, I do not fall flat on my face while walking across the stage. Before I know it, we are throwing our caps into the air and friends and family are rushing to the gym floor to congratulate us.

Suddenly, I am in a vice like hold being swung around. "Jacob," I pant breathlessly as he releases me not so gently back to the floor. Charlie grabs my shoulder to steady me before pulling me into an awkward hug.

"Congratulations, kiddo! I'm so proud of you."

"For graduation or for walking across a flat surface without tripping?" I joke, pulling away from him.

As the red crept to his cheeks, he sheepishly answers, "Erm... both, I guess." Then we both burst into laughter.

I look around for Edward, Alice, and the rest of the Cullens. When I spot them across the gym, I wave. I start to head in their direction, but Jacob latches onto my hand tugging me back to him.

"You'll see them later at the party, Bella," he huffs. "Billy wants to congratulate you."

I nod and stumble after him as we weave through the crowd.

\o/\o/\o/\o/\o/\o/\o/\o/\o/

I hop out of Jacob's Rabbit and head to the front steps at the Cullen home. Even though I consider it my second home, I am still in awe of the beauty of it. Every time I come here I have to stop at least briefly to admire the home. While I am remembering the many wonderful times I have spent here, Jacob wraps his arm tightly around my waist. I swear he is grumbling something under his breath that sounds like "only wants to brag about their wealth."

I cannot help smiling to myself as that is so far from the truth, but outwardly I scowl at Jacob. I do not know what his problem is, especially since Esme is practically my mother. Then maybe that is the problem. Whereas I readily accepted her as a mother figure to fill the void of my absent mother, perhaps Jacob sees her as trying to replace his mother who died when he was a young child. Maybe that is why he is so cold to the entire family. The Cullens are a tight knit family. Could he be jealous?

I am disrupted from my musings by the applause that erupts as we walk through the front door. Detesting the spotlight, I quickly glance around the room seeing Angela and Ben standing near the fireplace. I head toward them with Jacob attached to my hip. Angela and I hug awkwardly, what with Jacob not letting go of me. I quirk an eyebrow at him and squirm slightly in his grasp. Thankfully, he gets the hint and moves his hand to the small of my back. Angela, Ben and I chat a while about their summer plans.

Jacob begins to shift his weight from foot to foot. I glance up at him, noticing the bored, slightly agitated, expression on his face. I pat him on the shoulder whispering, "Let's get something to eat." Raising my voice slightly to address Angela and Ben once more, "You guys have a great trip and, Angela, when you get back we'll discuss what we will need for the apartment."

Angela nods, pulling me in for a quick hug before I take Jake's hand, leading him to the kitchen. If anything will lift Jacob's mood, food will do it.

Esme is refilling a chip bowl when we entered the kitchen.

"Esme, thank you so much for including me in the graduation party," I say as Jake starts piling food on his plate.

"Bella, of course, we would include you as a guest of honor. You know I think of you as my daughter," Esme replies as she walks around the kitchen island to engulf me in a warm hug. I blush a bright pink at her kind words. Truth be told, I was extremely touched when I saw my name alongside Alice's and Edward's names on the invitations. "I'm sorry your mom couldn't make it," she whispers before releasing me.

I am about to reply when two small hands wrap around my arm pulling me backwards toward the living room, causing me to stumble slightly.

"Alice!" I yelp. "That really isn't a wise thing to do to someone as balance challenged as I am."

Alice smirks at me. "But Bella, we didn't get to see you after the ceremony in the gym and everyone wants to talk to you," she whines as she plops on the couch pulling me down next to her.

Rose wraps her arms around me in a gente hug from beside me on the couch. "Congratulations! How does it feel to be a high school graduate?"

"Exciting," I answer. "Where are the guys?"

"They went to get food," Rose responds, looking around.

Alice giggles, "They got cornered by Great Aunt Bertha. I was looking for them when I found you in the kitchen." She giggles again before sighing, "I do feel bad for Jasper, though." She points towards the dining room where we can see Edward and Emmett getting their cheeks pinched by a small white-haired woman. We look at each other and burst out into laughter.

We are wiping our eyes when a plate of food appears in front of Alice and Jasper's southern drawl is heard saying, "What is so funny, ladies?"

We look up at him and try to suppress another round of giggles as we spy a red mark on his cheek. Alice shakes her head violently while accepting her plate of food.

We are still trying to catch our breath when Edward and Emmett approach. Emmett hands Rose a plate also inquiring about our outburst of laughter, which was getting harder to suppress seeing as they had matching marks on their cheeks.

"Well, it certainly isn't from remembering your speech," Jasper gives Edward a pointed look.

"I can't help it if your speech two years ago ruined it for the rest of us." Edward retorts before handing me a plate. "I hadn't seen you have anything to eat yet," he answers my quizzical expression.

I blush and immediately scan the room.

"He's talking to Billy and Charlie in the dining room," Edward whispers to me while handing me a soda.

I am about to ask him how he carried two plates and a soda when I see him pull another can from his pants' pocket before sitting down on the floor in front of the couch, facing us. A quick glance and I notice the other two guys sitting the same way. While we eat our food, we tease and joke with each other, just enjoying being together once again.

I am not sure how long we have been sitting here lost in our little bubble with Emmett telling story after ridiculous story about the kids in the class he was observing last semester, when I see Edward shift and tense slightly. I give him a curious look just as I feel two heavy hands on my shoulders. I jump, startled.

"Bella, Charlie and Billy are ready to go," Jacob states firmly from behind me.

I stand up, looking around. The crowd has really thinned out with only a few people who I assume are relatives of the Cullens remaining. The others must have noticed as well since they, too, are standing up, picking up our empty plates and soda cans. The others head to the kitchen to throw away our trash while I turn towards Jacob.

"So, are you ready to go or should I have Charlie take Billy home?" Jacob asks as he steers me towards the front door.

"No, Jake. I'm spending the night with Alice. You should go ahead and take Billy home," I tell him.

He pulls me out the front door. "What do you mean you're spending the night?! You just want to be with _him_," Jacob sneers.

"Jacob! We are just going to hang out for a while, then I am sure Rose and Alice will drag me into Alice's room to discuss the wedding. Rose is spending the night, too. I can't believe it is only a little over a month away," I ramble on, trying to ease the tension that is building between us.

"Don't play dumb with me. I know what guys and girls do to mark graduation."

I gape at Jacob, "That sounds oddly similar to the tradition you mentioned on prom night." Jacob stares at me so I continue, "So, you think since I wouldn't do it on prom night with my _boyfriend_ that I will suddenly decide to do it on graduation night with one of my best friends? Who I also happen to consider _family?_ Not to mention in his house where his _parents_, _sister,_ and _brother_ are also sleeping?" I seethe.

"Like I don't know what Alice and Jasper, Rose and Emmett have planned for the night," he spats back.

"If I remember correctly, you stayed out all night at Paul's graduation bonfire last Friday and it took you _two days_ to recover seeing how you didn't call me until Sunday afternoon."

"That's different!"

I balk at him, "Oh, really?! I am sure Leah, Kim, Emily, and Claire were all there."

"It's different," he states firmly for a second time.

"Yeah. The difference is I trust you and you don't trust me." I see Billy being pushed out the door and move to slide past Jacob. He grabs my wrist tightly, wrenching me towards him; I am sure to have a bruise later. We stand there glaring at each other when I hear Charlie clear his throat.

"Is everything okay out here?" Charlie asks, glancing between Jacob and me.

"I'll call you tomorrow, Jake," I seethe as I pull my arm from his grip. He must have been stunned by our sudden audience, as he easily lets me go.

I plaster a fake smile on my face, turning towards Charlie and Billy. "Billy, thank you for coming. I am sorry I didn't get to visit with you much."

"Don't worry about it. I'm sure I will be seeing you a lot over the summer. Anyways, I enjoyed myself; the Cullens have some interesting friends and relatives." Billy gives my hand a quick squeeze and I bend down to kiss his cheek. Billy really is great.

As I am straightening up, Charlie, who is still eyeing Jake, asks, "So Bells, I guess you'll be home some time tomorrow?"

"Yeah, Dad. I am not sure when, though. Alice will probably rope me into a shopping trip. She keeps going on about getting a new college wardrobe," I roll my eyes, laughing humorlessly.

"OK, kiddo, just don't spend your entire college fund." Charlie pats me on the back and starts wheeling Billy across the porch.

I shake my head with a small grin on my face before walking through the entry, shutting the door without a second look at Jake.

I slump against the closed door, shutting eyes and releasing a long sigh.

I sense movement to my right. Opening my eyes, I see Edward rise from the piano bench and turn towards me.

"Everything okay?" He nods towards my hand that is absently rubbing my wrist.

Quickly dropping my arms to my sides I reply, "Yeah, everything's great. Jake's just in a mood, you know?"

"If you say so, Bella," Edward shrugs and I notice his eyes seem sad, but maybe I am mistaken. He quickly flashes my favorite crooked smile before linking his arm with mine. "Come on," he says, leading me through the living room to the dining room.

Going through the living room, I notice the furniture has been moved back into place. "Where is everyone?" I question Edward.

"Those who are staying here have already turned in for the night and everyone else has left. The gang is helping Esme clean up the food while waiting for you to join them."

I blush and mumble, "I'm sorry."

"Don't be. You were saying goodnight to your father. Besides when I left, Jasper and Emmett were trying to see who could put the most cheese puffs in their mouth."

I giggle quietly at the image that conjured up.

Edward and I slide into chairs around the table and quickly we are all swapping stories and reminiscing while "helping clean up the food" by eating all the leftovers.

Soon Rose and Alice are dragging me to Alice's room, as I predicted, to discuss the wedding.


	2. Summer Vacation

Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author. The author is in no way associated with the owners creators, or producers of any media franchise. No copyright infringement is intended.

**My Life Plan**

**Chapter 2 – Summer Vacation**

I must have drifted off to sleep during the wedding discussion as I awoke blurry-eyed to dull light coming through the windows. It looks like it will be another beautiful, sunless day in Forks, Washington. Ok, so I am not much of a morning person.

I attempt to snuggle back into the blankets to recapture sleep, but my body betrays me and I realize I urgently need to pee. I wiggle out of the bed were I am wedged between Alice and Rosalie. I gently ease myself off the bed and shuffle out of the bedroom towards the half-bathroom down the hall. Sure I could have used Alice's bathroom, but I did not want to wake the girls. I have a hazy recollection of a shopping trip being mentioned last night and I would like to put off that torture for as long as possible.

Once my bladder is relieved I splash water on my face, wiping the last remnants of sleep from my eyes. I do not think my luck will hold long enough for me to retreat back into bed. Instead I decide to head to the kitchen to see if anyone else is up.

I stumble into the kitchen to see Edward hunched over a bowl of cereal at the kitchen island.

"Good morning," I mumble as I reach for a bowl in the cabinet.

"Morning. Are you going to sneak out now and make your escape?" Edward smirked.

"No," is my witty response as I return the milk to the refrigerator. I slip onto the bar stool next to Edward with my own bowl of cereal. "Anyways, it would only incur the wrath of Alice. She would hunt me down and drag me along anyways. I learned a long time ago there's no escaping the shopping fiend and its best to just go quietly."

Edward chuckles and nods his head knowingly. "How's the wrist?"

I look down at my arm. Noting a slight discoloration, I shrug my shoulders. "Its nothing. I'm fine," I state trying to sound nonchalant.

"Bella," Edward breaths sounding frustrated. "Its not _nothing_. _He_ left a mark on you."

Edward reached for my hand but I move it out of his reach and into my lap. "You know I bruise easily. Just let it go," I plead with him. "Family gatherings make Jake...nervous." Dropping my voice a little, I continue, "I think he's jealous of how tight-knit your family is. Speaking of which, where is Esme and Carlisle?"

"They took some of my relatives to the airport this morning. But Bella, don't try to change the subject."

"I'm not trying to change the subject there just nothing left to say on the Jacob subject."

"Bella," Edward says, starting to sound agitated, "Jacob should treat you better. You're right I do know you bruise easily. He should know that too and handle you more carefully – like glass or fine china. Not take his anger, or whatever he is feeling, out on you."

My anger flares, "Edward! Jacob loves me. He does _not_ treat me badly. You just don't understand how the death of his mother affected him."

I _don't _ understand?!" He challenges me.

"No! You had Carlisle and Esme as well as Emmett and Alice to help you through it. Rachel and Rebecca left home as soon as they could and never visit."

Edward stands up with the same sad eyes he had last night. "I just don't want to see you get hurt Bella. I care about you," he finishes quietly as he moves towards the stairs. He stops briefly to look over his shoulder, "I am afraid you are clinging too tightly to your life plan and aren't seeing things clearly." With that said, he quickly retreats up the stairs, leaving me

slightly stunned.

I cannot believe he made that comment. He is the only person I have ever shown my entire life plan to and now he uses it against me. How dare he?! I thought he understood. I mean, come on, everyone knows you need to put some forethought into your life if you want to accomplish anything. You cannot expect to live life by the seat of your pants and have the happily ever after. Rash decisions usually lead to pain. Life is a chain reaction – one misstep, one unthought through decision, and it all can come crumpling down around you. That is why I decided 8 years ago to map out my future; I am not leaving anything to chance.

What was probably only a few minutes later, Alice comes bounding down the stairs. "Bella, your turn. Rose is just finishing up so head on upstairs to shower. Your outfit is on the bed."

I roll my eyes as I scrape my now mushy remains of cereal into the trash before washing my bowl. Usually I would complain about Alice choosing my outfit for me, but after my confrontation with Edward I just do not have it in me.

Alice must have noticed my glum mood for she gently pats my arm before asking, "Everything ok this morning?

"Yeah. Your brother is so infuriating some times, you know."

Alice gives me a small smile while nodding, but her eyes have a glint to them like she knows a big secret, but isn't telling.

I roll my eyes again, briefly wondering if you could pull an optical muscle – maybe I should ask Carlisle. I am sure if you can I will sooner or later. After all I have pulled every other muscle in body at some point in time or other so it my be good if he was prepared.

I am aroused from my musings by Alice clearing her throat and pointing towards the stairs. I blush as I head upstairs passing Rose on the way. We exchange good morning before I trudge into Alice's room.

I shower quickly, not wanting to incur the wrath of Alice for taking too long getting ready. I run a brush through my hair deciding to let it dry naturally and slip on the outfit Alice wants me to wear. I do take my time brushing my teeth. I cannot stand to leave the house without clean teeth. I apply some lip gloss and eyeliner in hopes of appeasing Alice before heading into the hallway.

I had just closed the door to Alice's room when Edward emerges from his bedroom at the top of the stairs. "Hey Bella?"

I briefly close my eyes counting to 10. I need to calm my nerves; I really did not want to go round 2 with Edward right before heading to the torture known also as shopping with Alice and Rose. I glance at Edward with raised eyebrows with a "what now?" look on my face.

"I'm sorry if I made you mad. Just know that I will always be there if you need anything," he states apologetically.

"Thanks Edward. I know." After giving him a hug I turn to head down the stairs, but throw over my shoulder, "I also know Jake will never hurt me."

I arrive at the bottom of the stairs where Alice is tapping her foot and Rose is looking bored while examining her perfectly manicured nails.

"About time Bella. We're wasting precious daylight," Alice whines.

"Then we should get going," I say with a smile as I slip past her grabbing my bag from her hands. We climb into Rose's BMW to head to the mall.

Most of our time is spent wedding shopping. Rose still has not fully decided on party favors for the reception and she wants some new lingerie for the honeymoon. Alice wrangles me into buying a couple of new "college" outfits, as she termed them, and a dress for the wedding rehearsal before declaring it a successful trip. We grab some lunch at the food court before heading home.

It is late afternoon when Rose and Alice drops me off at home. I drop my bags on the bed and hang up my dress before picking up the phone to call Jake.

"Hello?"

"Hey Jake! Its me."

"Hey Bella. How was the sleepover?" He asks without interest.

"Ok. I'm not into threesomes though," I respond nonchalantly, but with a sly grin on my face.

"What?!" Jake exclaims.

I chuckle and blush, but at least I have he's attention now. "Yeah, Rose, Alice, and I fell asleep in Alice's bed and for such a small person Alice really takes up a lot of space when she sleeps." Its true, Alice likes to sleep all sprawled out and usually diagonally across the bed.

"Oh," he laughs. Jake sounds like he is in a more relaxed mood today. "So did you do the usual torture this morning?"

"Of course," I groan. "I'm kind of tired. Do you mind if we just hang out tonight?" I am pretty sure of his answer since most of the time Jake just wants to hang out at La Push with the gang or at my house watching the game on Charlie's flat screen.

"Sure, sure. Why don't you come over here. We can go down to the beach. It looks like we might have a nice sunset."

A glance out my window tells me the clouds have dissipated some. "That sounds great. Let me put something together for Charlie's dinner."

"No worries Bells. Billy and Charlie went fishing this morning and I'm sure they won't mind having a fish fry here. The Clearwaters will probably come by too. You know how your dad likes Harry's special recipe."

"Sounds good. Let me change into something more comfortable and I'll be over in a few minutes."

Jake chuckles, "Still in your Alice approved shopping attire? I don't know why you put up with it."

"Because I love her. See you soon," I reply before hanging up the phone. I slip into a pair of knit capris and a t-shirt. I wrap a sweatshirt around my waist for later and step into the bathroom to brush my teeth. I decide to pull my hair into the messy bun on the way downstairs. I stumble slightly on the last step, but I remain upright. Grabbing my keys I head out the door to hop in my old faded red truck. It roars to life as I slam my door shut.

I pull up in front of the Black's house and see the door swing open. Jake comes bounding down the steps, waving. No surprise arrivals when you drive a truck like mine, but that's ok, I wouldn't trade my truck for any other vehicle in the world.

Jake opens my door and I slide out of the cab. He kisses me chastely on the cheek. Pulling back he says, "I'm glad your here Bells," and gives me a big smile that lights up his entire face. Intertwining our fingers he continues, "I left a note for Billy and called Seth in case they go there first telling them about our plan. So if you are ready we can head down to the beach." I love sweet Jake.

"Yeah, let's go." I bump his hip and he starts leading me down the path. We walk in silence just enjoying being together. When we reach a large piece of driftwood he pulls me over to sit down. He wraps his warm arms around from behind me, resting his chin on my shoulder. For a while we watch the waves and setting sun.

"Bella?" Jake breaks the silence. "May I kiss you?"

I bite my lip as though I am contemplating his request, then I smile, "Yes, you may."

We both laugh lightly at our private joke as Jake turns me towards him and leans into capture my lips with his. He immediately deepens the kiss. My hands wrap around his neck as his hands slide from my shoulders down my back to my waist, moving my sweatshirt away. We break the kiss to breathe. His fingers play with the hem of my t-shirt while he attacks my neck. We make-out for a while then I pull away kissing him a few times softly on the lips before turning in his arms to face the waves again. Jake's a lot better now, but there is no reason to test his self-control; he is after all a red-blooded American teenage male.

"Thank you," he whispers, planting another kiss on the edge of my jaw.

I chuckle again remembering how this joke began.

I was 15 and Jake was 14. We were in this very spot. We had been walking along the beach joking around and stopped by this old trunk to rest. We had been laughing pretty hard when Jacob suddenly became serious.

He put his hands on either side of my face tilting my head towards him. He was already much taller than me. He looked deep into my eyes, sobering me up immediately, and declared, "Bella I love you." Then he crushed his lips roughly against mine, shoving his tongue into my mouth.

I was too stunned at first to react, but then I started pushing against his shoulders trying to get him off me, which turned to beating my fist against his chest when he wouldn't stop. I was starting to feel dizzy from the lack of oxygen when he finally pulled back. Without a second thought I snapped my arm back and rammed my fist against his jaw. I heard a sickening snap and felt a shooting pain from my hand to my elbow. The worst part was it didn't seem to phase him. I held my hand close to my chest and tears sprang down my cheeks.

Jacob reached towards me, exclaiming, "What the ..."

I cut him off, "Don't Touch Me!" I growled as I pushed past him rushing towards the house.

The lecture Charlie gave Jacob when he learned what happened was memorable. I kind of wonder when Jake asks my permission for a kiss if some part of him still worries what Charlie would do to him if Charlie thought Jake was taking advantage of me.

"What are thinking about Bells?"

"Remembering our first kiss." I feel Jake shudder beside me probably remembering the lecture too.

"That reminds me, Seth got his first kiss."

"Really?! How'd that go for him?" I ask hesitantly, really hoping he did not follow Jacob's example, but fearing he might have knowing how much Seth idolizes Jake.

Jake regales me with how Seth attempted to woo the girl before moving on to the love lives, or lack thereof, of our other friends. Jake is a great story teller. By the time he finishes I am laughing so hard tears are rolling rapidly down my cheeks.

Soon it becomes dark and we decide to head back to the house figuring Charlie and Billy are home by now.

Jake slides off the trunk before turning to help me to my feet. I wrap his arms around me as we walk back up the beach.

"So how is the plan going? Everything going according to schedule?" Jake asks half-jokingly.

Sometimes I regret ever sharing my life plan with him. I only did it to cheer him up. He looked so terrified after Charlie's lecture that I wanted to show him though his timing was wrong we would eventually be together. I thought it would make him feel better (the plan made me feel better) and perhaps a bit more patient. However, I do not think it helped much with his patience. I thought it best not to overwhelm him so I only showed him the part where we would start dating after I turned 16.

The morning of my 16th birthday found Jacob on my doorstep asking me out. He also knows I have more intimate details written into my plan since I showed him how I had planned our first kiss to go. I do not think Jacob really takes my plan seriously nor understands the complexity of it, which is only further complicated by his rash decision-making. He seems to think that we can skip over parts to get to other things, like his request on prom night. He might understand better if I showed the whole book to him, but I don't know. Edward is the only person to whom I have ever shown the entire book, but I knew he could appreciate it since he too likes making well-thought out decisions. Outside of this morning, Edward has never said anything bad about my plan. Whereas Jacob often makes jokes about the few parts I have shown him.

I am shaken from my thoughts by the sound of voices. We have reached the house and sure enough Billy, Charlie, and the Clearwaters are all sitting around a picnic table talking. Relieved I don't have to answer Jake's question, I greet Charlie and the others with probably a bit more enthusiasm than needed. But it is overlooked as the smell of fish cooking wafts towards me and my stomach grumbles loudly causing Jake to laugh boisterously.

Seth comes up to Jake and begins to talk animatedly while I wander over to Charlie.

"Just in time kiddo," chuckles Charlie as I sit down next to him. Soon we are heaping food onto our plates. It is basically quiet while we eat, with the occasional compliment on the food or comment on the best fishing hole. Sue and I clean up when we have had our fill. The guys move around the fire to sit with Sue and I joining them when we finish.

"Bella," Billy calls to get my attention. "I know you aren't big on presents, but I have something for you." He holds out a small pouch in my direction.

Thankfully it is dark and the fire does not provide much light so no one can see my blush. I accept the pouch, pulling the drawstrings to open it, and tilting the pouch so the object inside can slide out into my palm. I am stunned. A beautifully hand-carved wolf attached to a leather choker lays in my hand. "Wow. Thank you so much Billy. It is really beautiful." I clasp the choker around my neck before moving to give Billy a hug.

"You know it is believed the Quileutes are descended from the wolves," Billy begins as I release him.

I shake my head as I move to sit between Jake's legs. "Tell her the legend, Dad," Jake pipes up.

Billy tells us the story and several more before the conversation turns to embarrassing childhood memories.

I look up at Jake. By the fire light I can tell how relaxed he is, there is a lazy grin on his face and a sparkle in his eyes. At this moment he is my Jake, the one I love.


	3. Invitation

Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author. The author is in no way associated with the owners creators, or producers of any media franchise. No copyright infringement is intended.

Chapter 3: Invitation

I wake up later than normal Sunday morning following the late night in La Push. I'm supposed to go to the Cullens' house for lunch. Rose and Emmett are heading back to Seattle this evening since Emmett is working at a summer camp for the month of June and Rose wants to finish moving out of her apartment. Things definitely will be changing and I'm not sure how I feel about that. I don't like change, but I have known since I was ten years old that I would be at University of Washington come fall. What I didn't expect was my best friends, Edward and Alice, to be going to school across the country. At least Angela will be there, as well as Emmett and Rose. I still wonder why they are getting married this summer. I mean, they still have at least two years of school left at UW. On the other hand, it's saving me the trouble of finding an apartment since Rose's roommate, Kate, just graduated and is heading to law school in Chicago. Angela and I will be able to take over their lease this fall.

I push aside the anxiety that bubbles up whenever I start thinking about starting college as I get out of bed. I still have the summer to live through. My plan for the summer is simple, one, bolster my college fund by working at Newton's Outfitters, and, two, spend as much time as possible with my friends. I should be able to transition into my summer schedule rather easily. I am basically trading my school schedule for a work schedule. Thankfully I will be able to get a few more hours in than I typically do during the school year since Mike went to Mexico with Tyler and Eric, plus the summer is a bit busier for the store.

I am roused from my contemplations by the sound of pans banging around downstairs. I guess Charlie is up. At least breakfast is one meal he can handle. Even so, I should get up to start my day.

After a quick shower and throwing on some clothes, I go down to the kitchen.

"Morning, Dad!" I call out as I enter the kitchen.

"Morning, sleepyhead!" Charlie replies. "Want some bacon and eggs?"

"Sure," I answer, knowing he has already made enough for the both of us. I reach into the cabinet for plates and a glass. I pour myself a glass of juice and set silverware on the table as Charlie plates the food. Soon we are sitting at the kitchen table enjoying our normal Sunday routine – me with the funny pages and Charlie with the sports section eating The Special (truth be told, bacon and eggs is the only thing he knows how to cook).

I set the comics down and look around the kitchen. Nothing has really changed in the eighteen years Charlie has lived here. He and Renee were high school sweethearts who married after graduation, almost literally. He was so in love that he went along with her every impulse decision, including the quick trip down the courthouse aisle the Monday following graduation. Apparently neither one of them thought through the wedding night as nine months later, I arrived. With a little help from their parents and Charlie's steady income from his job with the police department, they were able to purchase the little two bedroom, one bath starter home. Mom did all the decorating and Charlie hasn't changed a thing (except add the flat screen TV to the living room) – maybe it reminds him of happier times. I don't think Charlie has ever stopped loving Renee, even after all the pain she caused him.

I sigh dejectedly as once again I am reminded of all the changes that will be occurring in my life in two short months. I must sigh louder than I realize as Charlie looks over his newspaper to ask, "Everything okay, Bells?"

I nod, "Yeah, Dad. Just thinking that in eight weeks I won't be sitting here anymore."

"Oh, Bella, don't be so melodramatic. You'll be home to visit and, anyways, I'm sure you'll find more exciting things to do on your weekends than hanging out with your dear old dad," states Charlie before returning to his paper.

With a frown on my face, I pick up my dishes to wash them. I mumble, "You're probably right," as I go back up the stairs to brush my teeth and get ready to go to the Cullens' house.

I hover briefly in my doorway surveying my bedroom. Like the rest of the house, not much has really changed over the years in this room. The crib was exchanged for a twin size bed and a secondhand computer was added, but otherwise everything has remained the same since the day I was brought home from the hospital. Eight years ago when I moved back, Charlie offered to repaint the room and buy me new bedding; he even offered to let me pick it all out myself. I did _not_ want a new color. I did _not_ want new bedding. I _wanted_ the familiar. This, too, I will be leaving behind shortly. Though I wanted to take it all with me, I had to agree with Alice and Rose, a college student needs something a bit more mature than the Hello Kitty bedspread that now adorned my bed.

I'm brushing my teeth when the phone rings. I ignore it, figuring Charlie will answer it.

Moments later, Charlie yells, "Bella! Your mom is on the phone!"

"Ugh!" I grunt, rinsing my mouth before going downstairs to the phone.

I eye my father as I take the phone from him in hopes of getting an idea of my mother's mood. All I get is a shrug of his shoulders as he turns back to the living room.

I sit at the kitchen table, taking a deep breath before greeting Renee with cautious cheerfulness.

Renee rushes out, "Hey, baby girl! I'm so, _so_ sorry I missed your graduation." .

"It's fine, Mom. It's no big deal," I respond despondently. She seems to be in her "happy" mood so there is no point in totally masking my feelings, she won't notice.

"No, honey. Graduation is important. And I am really sorry that I missed it. Last week was really bad for me. The doctor is trying a new medicine and it just sucked the life right out of me. But I'm feeling much better now."

"Mom, I understand. I'm glad you're feeling better."

"Does that mean you'll come visit Phil and me next week?" she hedges.

What?! We haven't talked about that, granted we don't talk much and when we do I don't listen to half of what she says, but seriously I haven't visited since they moved to Florida. She's probably only easing her conscience for missing graduation. "I don't think I can. I have work and I don't really have the extra money to spend on a plane ticket right now, if I could even get one at this late of notice."

"Oh, baby. Don't worry about the plane ticket; I have already booked your flight. You leave from Sea-Tac next Sunday night. I will email you the details," she babbles excitedly. I can almost see her bouncing.

"Mom!" I cut off her ramblings. Great, she spent money on this idea of hers. I wonder if Phil knows, yet. "I still have to work. They're shorthanded right now; I don't know if I can get the time off. Besides, I need the money before I start school in the fall."

"Oh, OK," she replies sadly. "Phil and I miss you and wanted to surprise you with a little vacation to the beach. We were going to surprise you with it at graduation. Do you really need to work? You have a full scholarship...." she trails off quietly.

Feeling all the fight drain out of me I answer, "I will see what I can do about getting the time off."

"Really?!" She asks sounding hopeful. Her moods bounce back and forth almost as fast as a ping-pong ball during a Chinese table tennis match.

"Yeah, Mom. I'll call you later in the week to let you know. I need to go now. I'm meeting Rose for lunch to discuss the wedding."

"OK, hun. I miss you and love you," she sings

"I love you, too, Mom. Talk to you later."

"Bye."

"Bye," I answer, hanging up the phone. I lay my head on the table with a long sigh.

"Everything okay, kiddo?" Charlie hollers from the living room.

Walking into the living room, I flop on the couch. "Yeah, Dad. Mom wants me to come to Florida next week."

"Hmph" is the only response I receive.

I look over at Charlie and I notice he is staring intently at the television "Dad," I begin slowly. "Did you know Renee was going to do this?" If Charlie knew about it maybe this invitation is more than just one of Renee's hare-brain ideas or attempt to ease her conscience.

I watch as the blush creeps into his cheeks before he answers, "Erm, well..." He rubs his neck. "She may have mentioned something like that a few weeks ago," he continues sheepishly.

"Why didn't you tell me?" My tone is laced with a tinge of disbelief. Why didn't he tell me; he knows how much I hate surprises! He better have a good reason or I am going to really be ticked off at him.

"Come on, Bells. Your Mom wanted to surprise you. She was so excited about being able to give you a bit of a senior trip so to speak. You know neither of us could go on a senior trip. Phil was completely in agreement so I knew it wasn't one of her impulsive stunts, and she would follow through. Though I do have to admit, when she didn't show up last week I was a little nervous."

I can only nod too overwhelmed with conflicting emotions to know what to say. On one hand, I'm upset with Charlie for not telling me, but a little shocked Renee actually planned something. Does this mean she really does want me to come? Or I guess more accurately will she still want me there next week when I arrive?

"So... Are you going to go? I think you should."

"I don't know. I planned on working." I look down at my lap. "Do I really have a choice?" I mumble. Goodness gracious they already bought the ticket. I'm sure it's non-refundable. I guess I will just have to go, so much for my plans.

"Of course you do..."

I stand up abruptly and rush from the room. Before escaping upstairs I vaguely hear Charlie mutter, "Well, o-kay, then." Once upstairs I hurry to brush my teeth, I cannot leave the house without clean teeth.

I briefly debate changing into clothes that are more Alice approved, but I decide to stay in what I am wearing. I pop my head into the living room to let Charlie know I am leaving.

I get a mumbled "have fun" as he is engrossed in the pre-game show of whatever sporting event that is playing today.

I grab my keys and jacket while slipping on my shoes. Smiling kind of triumphantly at the fact I accomplished the tasks simultaneously, I walk out the door. However, the smile is quickly wiped off my face as I catch my toe on the porch step and tumble to the ground. Shaking my head, I take inventory as I stand up. The knees of my jeans are slightly wet, but no holes. My palms are scraped up, but not really bleeding. I pat them gingerly on my pant legs to dry them as I walk to my truck.

About twenty minutes later I pull up in front of the large white house that has been my second home for the last four years. I walk right in, not needing to knock.

"Hey guys!" I give a halfhearted wave in greeting to Jasper, Emmett, and Edward who are playing video games in the living room. I continue towards the kitchen where I hear the girls talking to Esme.

Before I get there, Edwards calls to me, "Hey! What happened to your hand?"

I shrug slightly, blushing. "The usual."

He motions for me to come to him. When I get close enough he grabs my hands to inspect them. "Come on. Let's get those scrapes cleaned up," he says standing up, but not letting go of my hands.

Edward leads me to the bathroom and sits me on the toilet before turning to the cabinet to get out the supplies he needs. I sit, staring blankly ahead of me, not really paying attention. To be honest, I drove over here in a complete daze. I can't shake the feeling I was left with after the conversations with Renee and Charlie. I jump slightly as Edward presses a warm, wet cloth to my palm.

"Sorry," he whispers softly. "Is everything alright? You're being very quiet."

I turn my head to look at him; all I see is concern. Looking down to my lap, I state flatly, "Renee called this morning."

"Hmm," he hums while applying some cream to my scraped palm. "What did she have to say?"

"She apologized for missing graduation..." Edward only nods, paying meticulous attention to the placement of the bandage on my hand. "She also bought a plane ticket for me to come visit Phil and her in Florida."

"That's nice of them," he murmurs, putting the supplies away. I can only stare open mouth at him.

He turns back around to me; seeing my shocked look, he asks, "What?"

"The 'what' is she expects me to drop everything and go next week!" I sputter, exasperatedly throwing my hands in the air.

"Really, Bella, don't be so melodramatic..."

Cutting in, I mutter, "Why does everyone keep saying that to me today?"

Giving me a stern look from his place leaning against the vanity, he continues. "What does your dad think? Did Phil know she bought the ticket?"

Crossing my arms and pouting like a two year old, I petulantly respond, "Apparently Renee and Phil discussed it a few weeks ago with Charlie. They were going surprise me with it on Friday. But none of that really matters, because I can't just drop everything and run off because they think I need a beach trip."

"What's there to drop Bella? I am sure you can get the time off work." He raises a hand when I start to object. "Isn't Mike supposed to be back next week? And it isn't like you're leaving tomorrow, even though a little spontaneity in your life wouldn't kill you. You have a week, and if you tell them first thing tomorrow they should have plenty of time to work out the schedule. I think you should go, maybe get little color that isn't a result of your blush," Edward chuckles while tapping my cheek.

Needing to get out of the small space that is starting to feel smaller by the minute, I stand up, brushing past Edward as I exit the bathroom. "I told Renee I would think about it and I will. That is all I can promise," I say softly, turning back to him. "She and I were supposed to spend the weekend together here. That was the plan, you know. Everything is changing," I state barely above a whisper. I pull my bottom lip between my teeth as I feel my chin begin to quiver and tears building behind my eyes.

Edward nods slightly and gives me a small smile before reaching out to squeeze my shoulder. "It'll be okay, Bella."

We hold each other's gaze a few seconds longer before turning away, he towards the living room and me to the kitchen.

Most of the afternoon is spent working on wedding details. I mention the Florida trip to the girls and of course they also encourage me to go. Around four o'clock, Emmett lumbers into the kitchen to see if Rosalie is ready to head back to Seattle. I help clean up the wedding books, seating charts, and whatever else this stuff is that Rose and Alice insist is essential for planning the perfect wedding, that we have scattered around the kitchen island before hugging Rose and Emmett goodbye.

Rose remarks, "Bella, I'll call you this week about the things Kate and I won't be taking with us in case you think you and Angela could use them. And don't use wedding planning as your excuse not to go to Florida. I'm taking a break outside of a few things Kate and I can do in Seattle. Then Em and I will join the rest of the family in Alaska for the weekend. Since Alice will be there all of next week and you know she won't let me do any wedding prep without her, there is nothing for you to do the next two weeks." Rose smiles triumphantly.

I roll my eyes. When they, too, told me that I could get the time off from work, I mentioned my responsibilities and duties as a bride's maid to the fast approaching nuptials. Alice about threw a conniption fit, stating she'd be in Alaska for the next week and half and we could not under any circumstance do any wedding planning without her.

"Fine. I promise to think about it." Feeling my resolve crumple, I add, "When I go to work tomorrow, I'll see if the Newtons can spare me next week."

With a nod to me, Rose takes Emmett's arm to lead him out the door. He stops briefly to kiss Esme on the cheek once again and reminds her they'll see her on Saturday.

Alice and I wander into the living room to see what Jasper and Edward are up to. They are still playing some video game. Alice plops herself next to Jasper and curls into his side. I sit on the floor resting slightly against Edward's leg. A few minutes later Jasper whoops and Edward tosses his controller down with an exasperated sigh.

"Ha! I won again! I am the master!" Jasper smiles brightly while wrapping his arms around Alice in a big hug and kissing her on top of the head.

"Yeah, whatever. Keep bragging. If I played as much as you I could kick your butt in a heart beat, but I have better things to do with my time," Edward retorts.

"Well, I had to do something to fill those lonely nights while in Seattle without Alice these last two years. I guess we'll get to test your theory in a few months now that she and I are headed to New York together. I can guarantee I'll have better things to do with my time," Jasper replies with a sly grin.

"Hey now, that's my sister you are talking about. Gah, I don't really want to hear that." Edward runs his hands over his face and through his hair.

Alice giggles and I smile at the playful banter, until I remember in a few short weeks we will be scattered along opposite coastlines. Edward, perhaps sensing my melancholy, strokes my hair.

I blush at Edwards ministrations as I hear Esme come into the room.

"Bella, sweetheart, are you staying for dinner?" Esme inquires.

Realizing how late it is getting, I jump up. "No, I need to get home, but thank you anyways."

Esme envelops me in a tight hug; she whispers in my ear, "Bella, I hope you will go see your mother. She's trying to reach out to you the best she knows how. She loves you; give her the chance to show you."

I feel the tears pricking at my eyes and the last of my resolve falters. I guess I'm going to Florida. I nod my head, pulling away. I close my eyes briefly to compose myself before turning back to my friends.

"In case I don't see you before you leave Wednesday, have a great time in Alaska," I state, trying to sound cheerful. "I'll miss you."

I give Alice and Edward big hugs.

Hugging me again, Alice states, "It's not like you're not going to see us ever again. We'll be back at the end of next week."

"And it's not like you will be all alone. You will have the illustrious Jazz to keep you out of trouble," Jasper jokes with a devious smile and a wiggle of his eyebrows.

"Just be careful, Jazz. Dad would hate to miss out on another payment to our college fund by Bella having an accident while he's away," Edward ribs.

I'm beginning to blush profusely from all the attention. "I'll have you know I haven't had to go the ER, or have an impromptu visit to your Dad here for that matter, in quite some time. Thank you very much!" I huff.

"OK, kids, that's enough. Edward and Alice, please set the table, your father will be home soon and dinner is about finished. Are you staying for dinner, Jasper?"

"No, ma'am. I promised my parents I would be home for dinner tonight. Come on, Bella, I'll walk you out." Jasper throws his arm around my shoulders as I wave goodbye.

Jazz walks me to my truck and opens the door for me. "What do you say to having lunch later in the week with me?" Jasper asks as I hop into the truck.

"Sounds good. I'm working nine to four everyday this week, so I should get lunch around noon."

"Alright then, darling, it's a date!" Jasper smiles brightly as he closes the truck door.

I wave to him as I pull down the drive way towards home to cook supper for Charlie.

After the kitchen is cleaned up from supper, I tell Charlie I'm heading upstairs to bed. I realize I haven't heard from Jake all day. So after getting changed into my pajamas and going through my nightly routine, I hop onto my bed with phone in hand.

After several rings, Jacob picks up., "Hey Bells! What'cha doing?"

I can hear a lot of noise in the background and I am curious as to where Jake could be. "Nothing really, just getting settled in for the night. What are you up to? What's all that noise in the background?"

"It's just the guys. We're all hanging out at Paul's."

"Oh. Well, um, Renee called today."

"Uh huh," he responds, sounding a bit distracted.

"Yeah, she bought me a plane ticket to come visit her next week."

"Uh huh"

These non-responsive responses are getting old. "OK, um, well... I guess I'll talk to you later. You seem, um, busy."

"Uh, huh. Bye." The line goes dead before I can even respond. I stare confoundedly at the phone for several minutes for putting it on my bedside table. I'm not sure what just happened. I grab my phone, again, quickly making sure I hadn't missed a call or text from him today. Did something happen to day that I missed? No, there are no messages. Setting the phone down again, I stand up to go back downstairs.

I pause in the living room doorway before hesitantly speaking, "Hey Dad?"

"Yeah, Bells?" Charlie responds absently.

"Um, did you see Jake today, or maybe talk to Billy?" Surely something happened to make him so distant on the phone with me. Maybe Billy isn't doing well.

"No. Why?" he asks, looking over at me. Well there goes that theory – Charlie would know if something was wrong with Billy. Hmm, I wonder if he is still upset about Friday night. I thought were past that though since last night everything was fine.

"No reason really. I just got off the phone with Jake and he sounded a little distracted. I was wondering if maybe something happened."

"Sorry, Bells. Was he at home?"

"No, he said he was at Paul's. There was a lot of noise in the background."

"Well, I'm sure it's just boys being boys. Nothing to worry about."

I shrug. "Maybe. I'm going to read for a while before going to sleep."

"OK. I'm leaving early tomorrow to go into the station. Good night and have a good day at work."

"Thanks Dad. You, too. Good night."

I read my worn copy of _Wuthering Heights_ until I feel my eyes drooping shut. Putting my book down and turning off the lamp, I snuggle into the covers and let sleep overcome me.


	4. Motorcycles

Thank you to Project Team Beta and my new permanent Beta Jacky for helping to clean this chapter up.

Again the chapters aren't going where I thought they would. I have the next chapter started so hopefully it won't be long before I update again. The trip to Florida just isn't cooperating.

Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author. The author is in no way associated with the owners creators, or producers of any media franchise. No copyright infringement is intended.

**Chapter 4 Motorcycles**

The next few days fall into a comfortable routine. Monday, I go to work and then hang out with Jake in La Push while he works in his garage fixing up a motorbike. Tuesday, I go to work and then I have dinner at the Cullens' and help Alice pack – OK, I didn't really help her pack because she wouldn't let me, but I did chat with her while she packed. Wednesday, I go to work and Jake has dinner with Charlie and me before Charlie goes to his weekly card game with some of the guys from the station. Jake and I hang out watching movies,and making out a little bit – we don't get too involved since we both are a little weary of Charlie and his shotgun. We all know how well Jacob's attempt at kissing me went over with Charlie; who knows how he would react to walking into his living and seeing his only daughter being mauled. And now it is Thursday and I'm once again at work.

Jasper called yesterday to see if I am still free for lunch today. I am straightening the flyers and, well, stuff (I might have worked here for the last two years, but it doesn't mean I know what all the junk actually is) that is on the front counter as it approaches noon. I'm finishing filling a jar with plastic worm-like fishing lures (see, I do know what some things are that we sell in the store!) when I hear the bell at the door jingle. Looking up, I lock on to twinkling crystal blue eyes.

"Hey Bella! You about ready to go?" Jasper asks with uncharacteristic bubbliness. I think someone is missing a certain bouncy pixie. I have seen enough of Alice taking on Jasper's personalty the last two years while he's been in Seattle to recognize it in Jazz.

"Sure, Jazz." I can't keep from shaking my head and chuckling a bit. "Let me just tell Mrs. Newton I'm leaving."

He nods his head in acknowledgment as I turn to the back office.

When I return, Jasper links arms with me leading out the store. "Jazz, what's gotten into you? Are you feeling a little bit at loose ends without Alice around?"

"What?! Can't I be excited about taking my favorite brunette out for lunch?"

I quirk an eyebrow at him.

"Oh, OK. I admit I miss my little sprite."

"Seriously, Jazz, they have only been gone a day. How did you ever survive being in Seattle the last two years?"

"I'm not sure. Emmett threatened me a few times. It's worse here though, since I also have my parents to deal with. They know they'll be seeing less of me once Alice and I move to New York, so they're trying to squeeze in as much family time as possible. Don't get me wrong I love my parents, but it is hard coming home after being on my own for two years."

By this time we have reached the diner. Jasper holds the door open for me. Blushing, I sit down at the first open booth I see. We're quiet while we study are menus. The waitress comes over a few minutes later, taking our order.

"So, are you going to go to Alaska this weekend when Rose and Emmett go?" I ask Jasper.

"No, I promised Mom and Dad I'd spend the weekend with them. Though I will be going back to Seattle at the beginning of the week to help Rose move some furniture and take care of a few things for New York."

"Hmm," I nod as our food arrives. We eat in silence for a few minutes.

"Bella, are you going to Florida to see your mom?" Jasper asks with a cautious glance at me.

I take a sip of my soda and let out a sigh. "Well, I asked Mrs. Newton about taking a few days off. She said it would be fine; Mike is supposed to be back on Tuesday. I haven't called my mother yet."

"Why not?" He pops a fry into his mouth.

I shrug my shoulders while picking at the bun of my chicken sandwich. "I don't know."

Jasper continues to eat his fries while waiting for me to collect my thoughts.

"I'm afraid," I whisper.

"What are you afraid of, Bella?" Jasper prompts.

Blowing out a large breath, I toy with the fries on my plate before looking up at him. "What if she has changed her mind about wanting me there or something else has come up?"

"Don't you think she would have called if that was the case?"

"No," I answer succinctly. I continue when I see the raised eyebrow of disbelief. "Jazz, you guys have only met her once, but all of you think it is wonderful that she disrupts my life with this surprise trip. You don't know how she can be. She changes her mind more times in a day than Alice changes clothes ." I look down, unable to maintain eye contact, playing with the straw in my soda.

"Bella," Jasper begins, but pauses as if trying to decide what to say next. He pushes his plate away and leans his elbows on the table, dipping his head slightly trying to make eye contact. "Look, I'm not here to pressure you to go to Florida. If you're so reluctant to go why did you ask for the time off? You seemed excited that she was coming for graduation, why don't you want to see her now? Talk to me, Bella, I just want to understand."

I continue playing with my straw for a few minutes before leaning back in the booth, crossing my arms in front of me. "I asked about the time off because I told Mom I would. And unlike her, I keep my word. Also, it isn't like I really have a choice. Like I said, everyone thinks I should go. I'm going to call her when I get off work to let her know I'm coming." Looking at my watchI say, "I got to get back to work. Thanks for lunch."

I reach into my pocket to pull out some cash for my part of the check, but Jasper waves me off. "I got it Bella. Thank you for coming to lunch with me. I might have gone stir crazy if I didn't get out of the house," he jokes. I just nod, but as I turn to go he grabs my hand. "You know if you ever need to talk you call me any time, right?"

"Yeah," I acknowledge softly with a small smile then turn to leave the diner.

The rest of the afternoon passes relatively quickly and before I know it I'm heading home.

I have some time before I need to start working on dinner and decide now is as good a time as any to call Renee.

Sitting at the kitchen table, I take a few deep breaths, preparing myself for which ever mood Renee is in, before dialing the phone. After two rings, much to my chagrin, the phone is answered.

"Hello?" a male voice answers.

"Hey Phil. It's Bella." I'm slightly relieved that Phil answered and not Renee, but it still would have been better had the call went unanswered.

"Hey sweetheart! So are you coming to visit?" Phil asks hopefully.

"Yeah, if it is still alright. I probably should have called sooner. If you guys have other plans I understand. I don't want to be in the way or anything ..."

"Bella," Phil chuckles, cutting off my rambling. "Of course it is still okay for you to come. We really want to see you. We really hated to miss your graduation. If we would've known how changing medicine was going to affect your mother we would have waited until after graduation and your visit. We've been looking forward to you coming for the last month or so," he reassures me.

"OK. So, um, how is Mom? I mean..." I stumble for the right words.

"She's continuing to do really well. Bella, she knows she's made mistakes in the past and she has really put in the effort to get better. You would be proud of the progress she has made."

"OK," I'm still unsure of what to say. "I guess I'll see you on Monday then."

"Yeah, we'll meet you at the airport. We love you sweetheart."

"Love you too, Phil. Bye"

"Bye."

Charlie comes home just as I am checking the casserole in the oven. "It smells good in here, Bells."

"Thanks Dad. It'll be a couple more minutes before it's ready."

"That's fine," he replies while pulling a beer out the fridge. "I'm going to go up and change."

A few minutes later he comes down the stairs just as I am setting the plates on the table. We eat in comfortable silence for several minutes. Clearing my throat slightly, I break the silence. "So, I called Renee today."

Charlie looks up from his plate, but does not correct my use of my mother's given name. He takes a drink of his beer, then asks, "How is she?"

"Actually, I didn't talk to her. Phil answered the phone." Charlie just nods so I continue, "I told him I got the time off from work so I could visit them."

"Good," Charlie states, returning to his dinner.

"You don't have worry about meals while I am gone. I made extra the last couple of days and froze them."

"Bella, I can take care of myself. Besides I'll have to get use to it soon enough." He must have noticed my crestfallen look at the thought of my leaving at the end of summer as he quickly adds, "Thank you, I appreciate it."

Later that evening after the kitchen is cleaned up and Charlie is reclining in the living room I call Jake to see if he can take me to the airport Sunday night since Charlie has to be at work so early on Monday morning.

"Hello?"

"Hey Jake!"

"Hey Bells. What's up? How was work?"

"Good. I was calling to see if you can take me to the airport in Seattle on Sunday. My flight leaves really late that night and I don't want to have Charlie out that late with an early morning shift on Monday."

"Where are you going? You haven't mentioned going anywhere to me. You know we only have a few weeks together before you leave for Seattle permanently," Jake huffs.

"Jake." I attempt to stop his rant before he really gets going. "Phil and Renee surprised me with a trip to Florida for graduation. I'm sure I mentioned it to you." I did, didn't I?

"No, I think I would remember if my girlfriend was shorting our time together by taking a trip to Florida. I'm sure you told Edward all about it."

Wow, he sure is in a mood tonight. "I'm sorry if I didn't mention it to you. I just found out a last Sunday and I had to get everything arranged. I guess with the wedding planning last weekend and trying to get in a routine this summer it just slipped my mind. And, you know, when I'm with you I'm just so focused on being with you that I probably subconsciously repressed it, not wanting to think about being separated from you. I know we won't see each other much once classes start this fall and I want to fully enjoy every minute I get to spend with you now," I purr in an attempt to placate him.

"But you did tell Edward, didn't you?" he questions condescendingly.

"Yeah, but only because I went over to his house after Renee called and he noticed that I was upset. So can you take me to the airport?" I try to redirect the conversation back to the original point.

"Why are you even going? You told me you needed to work this summer. Was that just an excuse so you didn't have to spend time with me?"

"What?! Jacob, you aren't making any sense. What has gotten into you?"

"Nothing. I just find it odd that you are running off to Florida to see a woman who couldn't be bothered to come to her only daughter's graduation. Really, Bella, how often have you seen Renee in the last eight years? Are you even sure she wants you to come, this isn't some attempt to make herself feel better?"

I sniff, trying to hold back the tear as he puts voice to my fears. "No, Jake. She really wants me to visit. She and Phil have been planning this for some time apparently. She has been doing much better with keeping in regular contact, too," I attempt to state with some conviction, but I fear it comes out wistfully.

"Bells, I just don't want to see you get hurt. I mean, just because she wants to play mommy dearest today doesn't mean something else won't pique her fancy next week. I know that sounds harsh, but you have to admit it has happened before," he rushes on before I can interrupt.

I sigh heavily, "I know, but Phil assures me this isn't the case. And I have already told them I was coming. If I changed my mind now I would be just as wishy-washy as Renee. Once I make a decision I stick to it. So can you take me to airport?"

"Where were you at lunch today?" Jake asks with an accusatory tone.

"Huh?" I reply, not expecting this turn in the conversation.

"I was in town picking up a part so I stopped by Newton's to surprise you, but you weren't there."

"Oh. Jasper and I made lunch plans earlier in the week. I went to the diner with him. You should have told me you were coming by, we all could have gone to lunch together."

"Well, telling you would have ruined the surprise. Anyways I didn't know I was coming to town until this morning when I got the call my part was in," he retorts hotly.

"That's why I don't like surprises. You're upset over something I didn't even know you were doing. Ugh!" I groan exasperatedly. "I didn't call to fight with you Jake. I just need to know if I can get a ride from you, but if you don't want to take me to the airport I'll find someone else."

"Yeah. Maybe Jasper wants to take you since he likes spending so much time with you!"

"FINE! I am sure Jasper would love to take me to the airport. I thought it would give us a little more time together, but since you want to be impossible I don't think I want to spend four hours in a car with you," I growl before hanging up the phone.

Frustrated, I tell Charlie good night and go up to my bedroom. Once in my room, I flop onto the bed and bury my hands in my hair. "Arrgh!" I lie there a few minutes more before rolling over and closing my eyes.

I must have fallen asleep, for the next thing I know there is light shining through the window. I squint at the clock and see it is 7:30 a.m. I groan as I stretch. I pull myself out of the bed and pad into the bathroom. I groan again at my reflection. I have huge creases on my face; I must have slept hard last night. I feel stiff and grimy from sleeping in my clothes and I have an awful taste in my mouth as I didn't brush my teeth before I fell asleep. I turn the water on in the shower and strip off my clothes before stepping under the warm spray. Immediately I feel my tight muscles relax.

I must have taken longer in the shower than I thought as it is 8:00 a.m. when I return to my room to get dressed. I pull out my khaki work pants and Newton's Outfitters t-shirt. After dressing, I pick up my book and go downstairs to fix breakfast. Sitting at the kitchen table eating a bowl of cereal, I become engrossed in my book. As I finish the chapter I glance at the clock on the wall - only twenty minutes until I need to be at work. I hop up quickly, wash my bowl, and rush upstairs. I pull the towel from my hair to run a brush through my long locks and then pull it into a slightly messy ponytail. It'll have to do; I don't have much time. I quickly brush my teeth then rush back down the stairs. Unfortunately, I slip on the next to last step and crash into the floor. Rubbing my shin, I get up off the floor. I pull my shoes on, grab my bag and keys and am out the door with five minutes to get to work. Thankfully Forks is small and I make it to work just in time.

The morning goes by slowly. On my lunch break I decide to call Jasper.

"Hey, darling!" I hear Jasper's southern drawl on the other end of the line. "To what do I owe the pleasure of your call?"

I chuckle softly. "Jazz, did you say you were heading back to Seattle next week?"

"Yeah. I am heading that way on Monday to help Rosalie move some of the heavier items while Emmett is working at the camp. Why? Do you need something?"

"Well, yeah, sort of..." I hesitantly stutter.

Now it is Jasper's turn to chuckle. "Bella, spit it out. Whatever you need you know I am here for ya."

I sigh, resigned. "I kind of need a ride to the airport Sunday, but if you weren't planning on going 'til Monday that's fine. I can get Charlie or someone else to take me. I don't want to inconvenience you. I wouldn't even ask, I know you are spending time with your parents, but it is a late flight and Charlie has to work early Monday, but he can take me, I'm sure. I thought Jake would take me, but when I called yesterday he was all weird acting. I'm sorry Jazz, just forget I even called, I will find someone else..."

"Bella, Bella!" Jasper cuts into my nervous rambling. "Breathe darling. I don't mind taking you to the airport. I'm offended that you would even think that I wouldn't want to help you out."

"But..." I begin.

"But nothing, darling. I'm only going to Seattle for a few days to settle a few loose ends and help Rose and Em, then I will be back to Forks for the rest of the summer. My parents will be fine with me cutting our weekend a little short on Sunday. It would be my pleasure to take you to the airport. What time do you need me to be there?"

"Um, I need to be there around 10:30, 11:00 p.m., but any time that works for you is fine. I can just wait in the airport, read or something."

"OK. How 'bout I pick you up about five o'clock and we will stop for dinner somewhere along the way?"

"That sounds great. Thank you so much Jasper!" I tell him appreciatively.

"No problem, darling. And Bella?"

"Yeah, Jazz?"

"Please don't hesitate to ask for my help," he says with all seriousness. "I am happy to help you any way you need now and in the future. Remember that."

"Um, OK, I will. Thanks again. I need to get back to work."

"OK. Bye."

"Bye." I hang up with a small grin. I have the best friends; I don't know how I am going to survive when he and Alice move to New York. I shake my head to rid it of those depressing thoughts.

The rest of the afternoon passes without incident and soon I find myself heading home. I and tidy up the house so that everything will be in order before I leave for Florida. While I am trying to decide what to fix for dinner, Jacob calls. He apologizes for getting upset with me last night and offers to take me to Seattle. I tell him that Jasper will take me since he is going there anyways and it would just be simpler. He also asks if I want to hang out or something tonight, but I just want to stay in and hang out some with Charlie. I haven't really had much time with him since school got out and think I should spend at least an evening with him, so Jake and I make plans to get together after work tomorrow.

I'm just taking the fish out of the oven when Charlie gets home. After hanging up his jacket and gun belt, Charlie grabs a beer and plops in his chair at the kitchen table. "Smells wonderful, Bells." Charlie greets me tiredly.

"Rough day, Dad?"

"Long day," he responds.

"How much did you lose?" I ask, bringing over our plates.

He laughs. "A couple of weekend shifts and 3 overnights. I think that deputy is watching too many poker tournaments on late night television. He won just about every hand today."

I shake my head, laughing too. We eat in comfortable silence. Just as Charlie finishes eating he asks, "Did you find a ride to the airport?"

I nod my head. He stands up to put his plate in the sink. "Is Jacob taking you?"

"Uh, no. Jasper is going to Seattle next week so he said it wasn't a problem leaving Sunday evening."

"OK, that's good," Charlie responds. "Dinner was good, Bells." He grabs another beer and heads into the living room.

I finish cleaning up the kitchen then join him. As I flop on the couch, Charlie turns his head towards me from his recliner. "Are you going out?"

"No, I thought I would hang out with you tonight. That's alright, isn't it?"

"Sure. I just assumed you would be hanging out with Jake. Everything going okay between the two of you?" Charlie mumbles, never one to really want to talk about relationships or feelings.

"Yeah, Dad. Everything's fine. We just don't have too many more nights when you and I can hang out just the two of us, you know. But if you'd rather, I can call up Jake to go out."

"No, no. I was just checking," he rushes. "Uh, do you want to watch a movie or something?"

"If there's a game on I can read."

"No, there's no game on tonight. DVD or whatever is on TV?"

"You choose. I'm going to run up and change into my pj's. Do you want me to pop some popcorn?" I ask excitedly.

Charlie looks over me again with a small smile on his face. "That sounds good. We'll have movie night like we did when you were little."

I hop up and run upstairs. When I come back down I throw a bag of popcorn in the microwave. While it pops I grab the bowl out of the cabinet and a soda out of the refrigerator. "Do you need another beer or anything?" I call to Charlie as I dump the popcorn into the bowl.

"I'm good," he hollers back.

I go into the living room and find Charlie on the couch. I skip over to the cushion next to him on the couch and sit down. I cradle the bowl between us. After pressing play, Dad throws his arm around my shoulders and I snuggle closer relishing this rare occurrence of affection.

Saturday morning passes quickly; the store is busy. I can't believe Mrs. Newton only scheduled me for half the day while Mike was gone. Sure when we are both here we swap the morning and afternoon shifts so that our whole weekend isn't ruined, but with him gone that leaves a lot of the busier Saturday afternoon hours uncovered. After quickly eating the sandwich I packed, I head to La Push to hang out with Jake. When I get to his house I go directly to the garage around back knowing that he has spent the morning working on the motorbike.

I hear laughing as I approach. Just as I come in the door, I hear, "Hey Bella!"

"Hey Quil, Embry! How are you guys?" Quil and Embry are Jake's best friends and they're the tribe's pranksters. I don't think I have ever seen either one of them without a goofy grin on their face. They love life and do not hesitate to live it to the fullest, unless it is their love lives. I know for a fact they have their eyes on a couple of girls, but they never seem to get past the middle school teasing phase. Maybe the will grow up this year and ask them out; they will have the prom this year and surely they will want dates.

"Good," Embry replies. "We're just about finished with the bike. What do you think about going for a ride?"

"Um, I don't know," I hedge. "Charlie's not too keen on motorcycles." I look around for Jake. I spot him in the back as he turns around, wiping his hands on a rag.

"Bells, come on. It'll be fun. You can just watch if you want." He gives me a big smile while wrapping his arms around me to pull me into a hug. I snuggle into his chest, soaking up the warmth.

"Well, I guess. 'Long as I am just watching it should be okay."

"Great!" shouts Quil, clapping his hands together. "I'll start loading up the bikes. Bella, you parked close to the garage, didn't you?"

Lifting my head from Jake's chest to look over my shoulder at Quil, I answer, "Yeah, why?"

"We need to load the bikes into the bed of your truck," Embry responds, pushing one of the bikes out of the garage.

Jake whispers, "Dad isn't too keen on riding motorcycles either, plus none of us has a motorcycle license. So we need to take the bikes up to the trails near the cliffs to ride."

"Oh." I nod my head not knowing what else to say. Jacob releases me to start pushing another bike out of the garage. I follow him and see that Embry and Quil already have their two bikes loaded.

"I'll drive, Bella, I know where the turn off is for the trails," Jacob says a few minutes later holding his hand out for the keys.

"OK," I reply and hand him the keys. We all pile into my truck and head towards the cliffs.

Shortly we're there and unloading the bikes. "Are you sure you guys know what you are doing?" I ask dubiously, looking at the curves and slope of the trail.

"Sure, sure," is Jake's reply, the other two nod.

Once all the bikes are unloaded they discuss where they are going to ride. Apparently there is a loop back to this spot and they decide to take that trail. Jake asks if I want to ride along with him, but I decline. I tell them I'm here to watch and perhaps provide a lift to the emergency room which gets a laugh from the boys.

The boys hop on their bikes and speed down the trail; I can see them for about five minutes before they take a curve. I wait about another twenty minutes or so before I can hear the roar of the engines. They pull up behind my truck where I'm sitting on the tailgate.

They are all smiling. "Good ride, guys?" I ask.

"Oh, yeah!" exclaims Jake.

"It was great!" Quil bellows.

While Embry declares, "You did a great job getting these bikes back into top condition Jake."

"You guys want to go again?" asks Jake.

"Yeah!" Quil and Embry shout in unison.

"Bells, you don't mind, do you?" Jake asks.

I am kind of bored just sitting here, but the excited looks on Quil's and Embry's faces and the puppy dog eyes I am getting from Jake has me answering, "No problem, go have fun."

"You're the best, babe!"

"Yeah, Bells," Embry chimes in, while I get a huge smile and pat on the back from Quil before they hop back on their bikes and ride off.

I sit there until the roar of the engines fades away, then I decide to walk down the path that leads to the top of the cliffs. At least it will be a change of scenery. As I approach, I see Sam Uley standing in swim trunks at the edge. Not wanting to startle him I holler, "Hey Sam!"

He spins around. "Oh, hey Bella. What are you doing up here?"

"Uhm." I am not sure if I should tell him what the guys are doing or not. Sam is a few years older and is sort of an elder in training, so he might say something to Billy. "I'm just getting some air?" I say hesitantly.

Apparently Sam either does not pick up on my unease or chooses to ignore it. "Yeah, me, too. This is a great place to get away from everything and the adrenaline rush really clears the mind."

Adrenaline rush, huh? Oh! "Are you going to jump?" I ask looking over the edge. I gulp audibly – it's a long way down and there are sharp looking rocks and angry waves, oh my! "It is really far down there. Are you trying to kill yourself?" I ask incredously. There's no way anybody could survive that fall.

Sam laughs. "No, I'm not trying to kill myself. I'm cliff diving. I've been doing this since I was a child. Actually, all the boys on the rez do it. Has Jacob never brought you up here?"

"No. Jake probably thinks my less than graceful coordination would send me plunging to my death." I pause before softly asking,So it's safe?" I've seen people in exotic locales on television jumping from cliffs, but the water usually looks peaceful, not crashing into boulders. This can't be safe.

"Yeah, as long as you are careful. I started out on some of the lower ledges, but now I jump from up here." Well I guess he hasn't died yet.

Still not understanding why one would want to do this I ask, "What's it like?" Maybe all the Quileute guys are adrenaline junkies.

"It's great, there's no other feeling like it. For a few seconds all thoughts leave your head. It's like complete oblivion. Like I said, it's great for clearing the mind."

I nod my head, not knowing really what to say. Sam continues to stare out at the water. I realize I am probably keeping him. "Uh, do you mind if I watch?" I am kind of intrigued by the idea, but not so sure about the free fall. "I can go, though, if I am bothering you."

"No, no. It's fine. Maybe Jacob will bring you up sometime and let you try." Sam flashes me a smile then dives off the edge.

I watch as he falls and hear the faint splash as he hits the water. I sit down on a nearby boulder, staring out over the water not really seeing anything, and let my thoughts wander. I'm not sure how long I sit there but I finally hear the faint roar of engines alerting me that the guys are almost back to the truck. I stand up and dust off my shorts before walking back to the truck still slightly lost in my thoughts. I make it back to the truck just as the guys pull up.

They're talking excitedly as they load the bikes in the back. I climb back into the cab. When they finish Jacob slides behind the wheel and leans over to give me a kiss. "Everything okay, babe?"

I nod my head without looking at him.

"Hey," he says, he nudging me, "I'm sorry."

I whip my head around., "For what?" I'm still a little lost in my own head and not really paying attention.

"I shouldn't have left you alone so long. I promise I'll make it up to you when we get back to the house. We can share some quality alone time together," he says softly with a smile and a wink.

"No, I just let my thoughts get the better of me."

"OK," he accedes as he starts up the truck, "You want to talk about it?"

"Um, that's okay. You know all the stuff that is happening this summer. My trip to see Renee, getting ready to move to Seattle, my best friends moving across the country in a few weeks, it's all a bit overwhelming."

Jacob nods and hums in acknowledgment as we drive back to the reservation.

After we get back, the guys unload the bikes before Embry and Quil head home. Jake and I hang out in his garage for a while longer, chatting about nothing of consequence and singing along to the radio while Jake cleans up the garage. Billy isn't at the house when we get there so we hang out in the living room, watching a movie. Jake keeps his promise of "quality alone time" - we spend the next hour or so making out.

When the movie is over I decide it is time to go home. Jake walks me out to my truck.

"So, you leave tomorrow?"

"Yeah, Jasper is taking me to the airport ." I'm still a little angry about the fuss he put up when I asked him to take me.

Jake winces slightly at my harsh tone. "When will you be back?" he asks quietly.

"On Thursday."

"Do you need a ride home?"

A little shocked I respond, "No, Jasper will be coming home for the weekend so he will bring

me back."

Jake nods. "OK. Will I see you next weekend?"

"Sure, I am going to work my regular hours on Friday, but I'm going to work a full day on Saturday to get in a few more hours. So I might be a little tired, but we can hang out or something."

"No problem. Have a good visit." He leans in to give me a chaste kiss on the lips.

"Thanks," I breathe against his lips, pressing mine against his once again. Finally we break apart and I hop into my truck.

Once home I start dinner and then go to my room to pack. I realize I need to do laundry before I leave, otherwise Charlie won't have anything to wear by the end of next week, Istart the wash and then I go back to the kitchen with a book to read while waiting for the washer and dinner to finish.

Charlie and I eat a quiet dinner before he goes into the living room to watch television, I clean up the kitchen and finish the laundry. I'm putting the last load in the dryer when the phone rings. I hear Charlie answer it. "Bells, it's for you!"

I pick up the phone in the kitchen, "Hello?"

"Hey Bella," the voice on the other end answers.

"Edward! How's Alaska? Enjoying time with all your relatives?" I respond excitedly. I didn't realize how much I missed him until right now.

"Yeah. It's great. I heard you're going to Florida."

"Yep," I say, popping the p.

"That's really good. Please try to enjoy your trip." He pauses as if choosing his words carefully., "Maybe you can talk to your mom, maybe tell her how you feel..." He trails off quietly.

"Hmm, maybe.," I doubt it. Renee isn't known for serious conversation.

There is a lull as neither of us is sure what to say next. Finally, Edward breaks the silence by saying, "Well I just called to wish you a great trip. If you need anything you can call me. Don't worry about the time. Remember I am _always_ here for you."

"Thanks, Edward. I can't wait until we are all back in Forks. I miss you guys. Tell everyone hello for me."

"I will, Bella. We all miss you, too, and can't wait until we are home either."

"See you soon."

"Yeah, Bye."

I hang up the phone and decide to go to bed. The last load in the dryer can be folded tomorrow.

Sunday morning Charlie and I enjoy our normal routine. I grab the laundry from the dryer and head upstairs to pack. Around lunch time, Charlie knocks on my door. "Hey, kiddo, want some lunch?"

"Oh, yeah, let me go down and fix something for you." I drop the shirt I'm folding and start out the door.

"It's okay. I made some sandwiches," I hear Charlie say behind me. "I thought we might spend a little time together before I go to work and you leave for Florida," he continues as I turn to face him. I notice he has a curious look on his face that I can't quite figure out, like he is trying to work out a math equation or something.

"That would be great, Dad" I continue down the stairs.

We occasionally talk while eating, though for the most part we are silent. But it's okay; we don't need to fill every second with meaningless chatter. Soon we are finished and Charlie stands in the kitchen doorway while I clean the table. He clears his throat.

"Bells, I know you aren't really looking forward to seeing your mom, but maybe you can sort out your differences and, I don't know, find forgiveness or peace or whatever you need."

I nod my head to acknowledge I heard him as I turn to the sink to wash the dishes. Charlie comes to stand next to me and puts his hand on my shoulder. "I know I don't tell you this often enough, but I love you, kiddo. I want to see you happy, okay? I think whatever it is between you and your mom is keeping you from being happy."

I stare at him, not sure what to say, Finally I croak, "OK." I clear my throat and continue. "I have some meals in the freezer for you so you don't have to eat steak and potatoes at the diner every night I am gone."

Charlie huffs out a deep breath, nodding his head. He pats my shoulder a few times before saying, "Well have a good time and don't worry about me; I'll be fine." With that he heads off to work.

I clean up the rest of the kitchen and tidy up the house before finishing my packing. At five o'clock Jasper pulls into the drive. "Are you ready?" he asks as I open the front door.

"As ready as I will ever be."


	5. Florida

Thank you to Project Team Beta and my new permanent Beta Jacky for helping to clean this chapter up.

Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author. The author is in no way associated with the owners creators, or producers of any media franchise. No copyright infringement is intended.

**Chapter 5 - Florida**

Jasper gives me a reassuring smile while grabbing my bag. I lock the front door of the house before climbing in the car.

The ride is fun. We sing along to the radio and talk about what we have planned for the rest of the summer. We talk briefly about my moving to Seattle and him and Alice moving to New York, but the subject is changed when it becomes too heavy. That's the great thing about Jasper; he seems to be able to sense one's mood, never pushing too far, and can change the conversation without it seeming forced or awkward. He is going to make a great psychologist one day. We stop for dinner at a favorite diner of Jasper's halfway between Port Angeles and Seattle. It's a mom and pop place, but Jasper swears they make the best ribs. I won't claim to know ribs as well as Jasper, but they were the best I have every had.

We get to the airport about an hour before my flight. Jasper, probably sensing my unease, offers to go in with me and wait, but I remind him that he can't go beyond the security check point. I don't want him paying for parking either; it was already so nice of him to give me a ride. We pull up to passenger drop off and he gets out of the car to get my bag out for me. He wraps his arms around me tightly while reassuring me that everything will be fine. I thank him again for the lift and he tells me to have a good time. I wave as he pulls off and then head in to find my gate.

I doze on and off through the entire plane ride. It isn't too comfortable sleeping on a plane, and adding in my anxiety of seeing my mom, I'm surprised I slept at all. My flight arrives right on time. As I step off the plane, I think it's now or never. I take a deep breath and follow the signs to baggage claim were Renee and Phil are to meet me. Please let them be there.

I am barely through the doors when I hear, "Bella! Baby! Over here!" I look in the direction of the shouts and see Renee bouncing up and down, waving her arms over her head. Ugh, but at least she is here. I see Phil standing next to her with a hand on her shoulder, probably to keep her from racing through the airport.

As I approach, Renee breaks free of Phil and grabs me in a tight hug. "You're here. Baby girl, I am so excited to see you."

I feel Phil pat me on my back. "Yeah, Bella, we're glad you came. Do you have any checked luggage?"

I shake my head as I try to disentangle myself from Renee's arms. "No, all I have is my carry on."

"OK, then let's get this show on the road!" Renee exclaims. Great, she is in her "hyper" mood;, there's no telling what this week will bring.

Renee chatters nonstop about anything and everything all the way to their house. "You're going to love the house, Bella. You have your own bedroom and bathroom. I don't know how you lived all this time sharing a bathroom with your father...."

I don't bother replying as she continues on to another subject. I just nod occasionally, feigning interest. Soon we pull into the driveway of a large, but modest home. I see Renee has kept the desert themed landscaping she loved in Phoenix. I barely step out of the car before Renee grabs my hand and drags me to the house. "Come on, baby. I can't wait to show you your room." I stumble after her and up the stairs. She pulls me through a door into a spacious bedroom that has a queen size four poster bed, a cherry wood armoire and matching desk. The bedspread is brown with pink dots, the curtains are brown and pink striped, and the rug on top of the hardwood floor is pink and brown checkered. The room looks like it came out of a Pottery Barn catalog.

"Honey, do you like it? I know how much you like pink. Remember the fit you threw when I tried to change the Hello Kitty bedding you had?" I nod, because I don't want to tell her that it wasn't the pink that I liked so much, but the reminder of better times.

"Well, Bella, we'll let you get settled in. The bathroom is through that door." Phil points towards a door on the left side of the room as he sets my bag on the bed. "Come down whenever you're ready." He gives me a kind smile and twines his fingers through Renee's as he leads her out of the room.

I sink onto the bed with a sigh of relief. I haven't been here two hours and I'm already exhausted. I guess it could be the jet lag. I decide to stretch out on the bed, which I have to admit is more comfortable than my old twin mattress at home.

I must have fallen asleep because the next thing I notice is a light knocking on the door and Phil entering my room.

"Hey Bella, are you hungry? Your mom is fixing lunch."

"Ren...Mom doesn't know how to cook," I mumble, still hazy with sleep.

Phil chuckles as he sits on the edge of the bed. "She might not be a gourmet chef, but she has learned a few basics in the kitchen," he says jokingly. "There's a lot about your mom that you probably don't know," he states in a more serious tone. "I understand this is hard for you. Renee has shared with me some about your childhood, but I promise you she has her illness under control now. She feels bad about the mistakes she made when you were younger, but she can't change them. She hopes that the two of you can come to some understanding and maybe be able to form a better relationship. Or at least you won't hate her," he finishes softly

"I don't hate her," I respond quietly. I'm not sure if he heard me or not.

"That's good to know. Please give her a chance," Phil replies solemnly before patting my knee. "Lunch is probably ready; we should go downstairs." He leaves the room and I follow after another minute.

Lunch is strained to say the least. It is filled with uncomfortable silences and forced conversation. It is like we're total strangers, which I guess is kind of the truth. I can count on one hand the number of times I have seen Renee since moving in with Charlie.

As soon as I finish eating, I hop up to take my plate to the kitchen, hoping to escape from the awkwardness, but to no avail. Phil grabs my plate and then Renee's saying, "Ladies, why don't you go relax in the living room."

I stare at his retreating form until Renee links her arm with mine and states, "Yeah, baby girl. We can catch up. I want to hear all about graduation and your plans for college. Any hot guys following you to Seattle?" She wiggles her eyebrows at the last statement.

I heave a sigh while stumbling into the living room with her. "Um, Ren.. um Mom, I have a steady boyfriend. You remember Jacob Black, Billy Black's son," I tell her hoping to end the conversation quickly.

"Oh, well, are you two getting an apartment together or is he just a high school fling?"

"No." Since the direct approach didn't work, maybe an evasive answer will give her the hint that I don't want to talk about it.

Renee blinks her eyes a couple of times at my blunt response. "Um, that's good honey," she says hesitantly – good she's confused by the answer, maybe I derailed the conversation. "You're too young to be getting serious about a boy. You'll have so many options at college that didn't exist in that rainy small hick town. You aren't having sex with him are you?" Whoa! This derailment is turning into a train wreck. "A pregnancy will ruin your life..." Her mouth snaps shut and her eyes widen, before she stutters, "I mean, uh, a pregnancy right now. You, uh, know you're so young. Um, what I mean is... uh. Are you on the pill? Using condoms?" Yep, definitely a train wreck.

I'm blushing profusely, but I am not sure if it is from embarrassment for the direction this conversation has gone or anger at what Renee has admitted – I ruined her life. I storm out of the room nearly knocking Phil down as he enters the living room. I slam my door shut and flop on the bed, burrowing my face into the pillows as I cry.

Eventually my cries subside and I hear a light knock on my door. I do not answer, but I hear the door creak open and Renee whisper, "Bella, baby, can I come in?"

I huff, but do not make any effort to move. However, I feel the bed dip and a hand running down my hair. "Sweetie, I am so sorry. I really didn't mean it the way it came out. Please, honey, look at me," she pleads in a quiet voice.

I turn my head slightly to peak at her through my eyelashes while Renee continues running her fingers through my hair. "Sweetie, I love you. I know how hard it is to raise a child at your age. You also have so many more opportunities available to you than I did. I just want to you to be careful so _you_ can decide what you want in the future, instead of having it decided _for _you."

Wanting this conversation over quickly, I respond. "Fine. I am deciding my own future."

"Are you being careful with your, uh, boyfriend?" she presses.

"Jake," I snap. "If you must know, I'm not sleeping with him," I say through gritted teeth.

"Oh, honey, is it because you're afraid to talk to your dad about seeing the doctor for birth control? I know it's something girls do with their moms so we could..."

I cut her off by sitting up and shouting, "NO!" I take a deep breath before continuing, "I'm eighteen., I can make my own doctor's appointment. If you are so concerned about my health you might have known that I have been on the pill for several years to regulate my cycle. I am not having sex because I decided I wanted to wait until I'm married." I cross my arms over my chest and glare at Renee, silently daring her to say any more to me.

She sits there for another moment before rising from her spot on the bed. "Ok," she whispers. As she reaches for the door knob she turns back to me. "I thought we could order Chinese food for dinner and watch a movie tonight or something."

"Whatever," I answer. I flop back against the pillows as she exits the room.

I lie there a few minutes before rolling to my side to reach my cell phone on the nightstand. I push the number two for speed dial.

After two rings, I hear the cheerful greeting, "Hello!"

"Hey Jake! I miss you," I sigh into the phone.

"Me, too, babe. How are things going with mommy dearest?"

"Ugh!" I hear him chuckle, but continue before he can interrupt, "she talked to me about sex."

"Did you learn anything good?" Jake inquires still laughing slightly.

"Jacob! It's not funny. She basically told me I was a mistake that ruined her life." I barely finish the statement before I begin sobbing.

"Shh... I'm sorry Bells. I wasn't laughing at you. Shh. It's okay. Calm down. Shh," Jacob soothes.

Taking a few deep breaths my sobs subside. "I'm sorry, Jake. I didn't mean to break down on you."

"Bells, it's okay. Renee doesn't deserve to have you as a daughter. I don't know why you went to Florida. You haven't even been there a full day and she has already upset you."

Rubbing my forehead, I reply quietly, "I'm not sure either." There is a brief pause in the conversation, neither of us knowing what to say. "Jake, I'm starting to get a headache so I'm going to let you go so I can rest before _family night_ starts."

"Sure, babe. Some of the guys are coming over soon anyways. Um, do you think we can borrow your truck?"

Confused, I respond, "I guess. Why?"

"Don't you trust me?" Jacob snaps heatedly back.

"It's not a matter of trust. I was just curious. Sheesh."

"Sorry. I didn't mean to snap at you. I guess I'm little _frustrated _that you aren't here," he says seductively. " Anyways the guys want to ride the bikes again."

"Oh, OK. Um...," I hesitate, not wanting to upset him further. "What are you going to tell Charlie when you ask for the key?" I ask softly.

"That I'm going to give it a tune up and make sure everything is in good working order for you to take it with you to Seattle, which is the truth. I don't want you to get stranded in the big city all alone this fall."

I roll my eyes, but don't remind him that Rose and Emmett will be in Seattle too. Instead I say, "Thanks Jake! That's really sweet of you."

"What can I say, I love ya, babe."

"I love you, too, Jake. Talk to you soon."

"Bye."

I replace the phone on the nightstand and continue lying on the bed. Finally I grow bored of staring at the ceiling and drag myself to the bathroom to wash my tear-stained cheeks. Not really sure what to do with myself I wander back downstairs. I see Phil and Renee curled up on the lounge on the patio. I slip past the patio doors into the kitchen to get a glass of water.

I am leaning against the cabinet sipping my water when Phil walks in. "I was just about to order the food. Is there anything you want with your sweet-n-sour pork?"

"Um." I stare at Phil, wondering if I don't have a choice like we are all having it or if he thinks that is what I want., "I don't really like sweet-n..."

Renee walks in the kitchen, and apparently having heard our conversation, she interrupts me. "Of course you like sweet-n-sour pork. Remember how you used to make kabobs out of it since you couldn't use chopsticks?" She turns to Phil, before continuing, "She would have that sticky sauce all over her hands and face," she laughs while curling herself around Phil's arm.

Tired of her trying to play up her mom role, I state exasperatedly, "Renee, I don't even remember the last time I ate sweet-n-sour pork. Phil, can I have chicken lo mien instead?" I ask. I turn back to Renee. "And for your information I can use chopsticks quite well. Esme took a Chinese cooking course and she patiently taught me how to use them several years ago for when she cooks Chinese food." I leave the kitchen, but call over my shoulder to Phil, "I would like some spring rolls, too, please."

I hear low murmurs from the kitchen, but neither Phil nor Renee follow me into the living room. I peruse the pictures on the mantle, noticing several of Renee and Phil with a couple of children. I pick one up to look at closer.

"That's my niece and nephew," Phil says from behind me, startling me. I put the picture back on the mantle before turning around. I open my mouth to say something, what I'm not sure, but Phil interrupts, "Food will be here in about 30 minutes. Why don't you pick out a movie for us all the watch?" He motions to a cabinet next to the television before returning to the kitchen.

Opening the cabinet, I notice there are several rows of children movies. I scan the titles of the other movies, but nothing really catches my eye. Between Alice and Emmett, it is rare that anyone else gets to choose a movie. Finally, I close my eyes and randomly pull a movie off the shelf. I place it on the coffee table without even looking at the title. I sit down on the couch to wait for the food. A while later I hear the doorbell and decide I should probably head to the kitchen to fix my plate. When I enter the kitchen, Renee is removing the boxes of food from the bags. She looks up at me as I bump into the doorjamb. Her eyes are red rimmed as if she has been crying, but she looks away quickly when she catches my eye. I stand awkwardly next to the doorway, rubbing the shoulder I bumped.

Phil hands me a plate."What would you like to drink?"

"I have a glass of water in the living room," I answer and start scooping lo mien onto my plate. I grab a spring roll and chopsticks before walking back into the living room. Renee and Phil follow shortly.

Phil grabs the DVD to put into the player while I expertly wrap noodles around my chopsticks. I am about to put them in my mouth when Phil says, "So you like horror, huh?" WHAT?! I about drop the food down my front as I stare dumbly at Phil whose back is to me. I recover and glance at the DVD case still on the table noticing the title – Halloween II. UGH! See what I mean about rash decisions? Phil starts the movie and I realize I haven't responded.

"Um, I know someone that had a small part in the movie," I answer, hoping it was the recent one. In attempt to hide my unease with the movie, I ask, "I noticed that you have an awful lot of kid movies. Did Mom go through a Disney phase or something?"

I notice Phil and Renee exchange a look, before Renee answered quietly, "We babysit Phil's niece and nephew, um, often." Oh, so she likes playing mommy with other people's kids, too. Hopefully their parents can undo the damage Renee inflicts on those poor kids.

I concentrate on my dinner in an effort to block out the horror film. Thankfully it only lasts a little more than an hour and a half. As the credits roll, I stand to take my dishes to the kitchen.

"Bella," Renee starts, "Before you run off, I wanted to let you know Phil has a meeting in the morning that he couldn't reschedule. And, I figure you will sleep in, you know with the time difference and all, so I will go to the class I'm taking, ok?" She looks hesitantly at me before rushing on, "It only meets this one day and my friend, Sharon, is going to pick me up so I can leave the keys to my car on the table in case you get up and want to go somewhere before I get back. It has a GPS system, with directions to the beach and other hotspots already programmed in."

I nod my head and leave the room. After rinsing my dishes and putting them in the dishwasher I go upstairs. About halfway up, I pause to decide whether I should tell them I'm going to bed or not, before throwing over my shoulder, "Good night!" Hopefully that will keep them from bothering me any more tonight.

I wake up the next day to brilliantly bright light. I'm disoriented until I remember I'm in Florida. "Ugh!" I groan as a contemplate facing another day with Renee. Why did I come again? Oh right, she is all better now and after all these years she's decided she wants to be my mother.

I slowly roll out of bed and head into the bathroom to shower. While showering, I remember Renee saying something about a class. I wonder how long she will be gone; I don't remember her telling me. When I'm finished showering and dressed I head downstairs to the kitchen. Glancing at the clock, I see it is ten o'clock. I search the cabinets for cereal, thinking that I should eat something light now in case Renee wants to have lunch together. I find a box of Wheaties and I pour myself a bowl. I take my bowl of cereal back upstairs to my room since I forgot to bring a book down with me. I eat my cereal leisurely while losing myself within the pages of the book.

My arms become heavy and my neck feels stiff so I set by book down on the bedside table and stretch. I am not sure how long I have been reading, but my spine crackles and pops a bit indicating it has been a while. Renee should be home soon from her class so I wander back downstairs. Again glancing at the kitchen clock on my way to the living room I note it is noon. I wonder if Renee came home and I just didn't hear her. I search downstairs, but find nothing to indicate she's been home. "Mom," I holler up the stairs, but receive no reply. I wander back into the kitchen to find something to nibble on as the cereal has worn off.

I decide to clean the kitchen while I wait as I am not sure what else to do. When another hour passes I decide to call Renee to see when she is going to be back. I know she left me the car so I could explore the area, but I thought she wanted me to come to Florida to visit with her. I run up to my room to grab my cell phone. I dial her number and hear it begin to ring. I faintly hear music and decide to investigate while waiting for her to answer. Heading into the hall I can hear it better, but it still sounds far away, maybe downstairs. I still hear the phone ringing – why isn't she picking up?. I follow the sound of the music to the front hallway. I realize just as Renee's voice mail picks up that the music I heard was her cell phone which is sitting on the entryway table. Great! Now what? Well she did say I could use the car.

I grab the keys and head out the door. I fiddle with the GPS system trying to figure out how to get to the beach. After about ten minutes I have it set – I don't know how Renee ever figured it out. What am I talking about? I bet Renee has never even used it. How many times did she tell me as a child "it's more about the journey than it is about the destination"? Phil probably had it installed just so he could find Renee when she got lost.

Twenty-five minutes later I pull into a parking area near the ocean. The beach isn't too crowded considering it is a week day. I see a strip of stores across the street. I get out of the car and head towards them. I glance through the windows of the shops – typical tourist stores. I notice a sandwich shop and stop to pick-up a wrap and bottle of water, before heading back across the street to the beach. I walk along until I find an empty bench near a palm tree. I eat my lunch and people watch. After a while I notice that my skin is pink and since I only do white or sunburned I decide to head back to Renee's.

Arriving back at the house I notice Phil's car is in the drive. I walk in and shout, "Phil!"

"In the living room, "he replies.

Dropping the keys next to the cell phone on the entryway table, I head into the living room. Phil is sprawled out on the couch watching some sporting show on the television. He glances at my direction and asks, "Where's your mom?"

I shrug my shoulders while answering, "At her class?"

"That should have been over at eleven. Did she call you? When did you leave?"

"Um... I tried calling her, but she left her phone here." I point over my shoulder towards the front door, "I left around one to go to the beach."

Phil sits up on the couch. "Bella..." he begins, but I cut him off knowing he is going to apologize for her.

"It's okay," I say, waving my hand dismissively. "She never said when she would be back and that I could take the car." I begin to exit the room, wanting to be alone, but Phil stands up and grabs my shoulder before I can leave.

"Bella, it's not okay. She was supposed to be home by noon. She... I...," Before Phil can figure out what he wants to say we hear the front door open.

"Honey! I'm home!" Renee sing-songs from the entryway.

"Renee! Where have you been?" Phil questions. I again try to make my escape from the room, but Phil holds fast to me.

I huff as Renee enters the room smiling brightly, but it falters when her eyes flicker to me. "I had my class this morning," she answers him hesitantly. "Bella, did you sleep well? When did you get up?" She asks me, trying to change the conversation.

Phil warningly says, "Renee, your class was at ten and it's now..." he glances at his watch, "almost four. Where have you been?"

"Well, you know, I got a ride with a friend so Bella could have the car." She turns to me and asks, "Did you go to the beach or shopping?"

"Renee."

She glances back to Phil who is staring hard at her. "Uh, a few people wanted to go to lunch and since I was at the mercy of Sharon who wanted to go to lunch with the others I didn't really have much choice. And since I didn't hear from Bella I figured she was either still asleep or didn't want to hang out with her old mom."

"She did try to call you, but you left your phone here."

"Oh." Then realization dawns on her and she grabs me by the shoulders, wailing, "Oh, baby, I'm so sorry. I didn't mean to ignore you or anything. I just got the impression last night that you wanted some space and then when I didn't hear from you this afternoon I … I didn't realize I left me phone. It's such a habit to pick it up with my keys that I must have not thought of picking it up since I was leaving the keys for you. I'm sorry."

I close my eyes and shake my head. "It's fine." I knew it would be like this. I don't know why I even came.

"No, baby girl it's not fine. I should have come home after class. I know. Why don't we get dressed up and go that really nice seafood restaurant in town? We'll have a nice dinner and show you around town some, you know, hang out together?"

I take a deep breath and exhale slowly. "Sure, that sounds great!" I attempt to sound enthusiastic. I have learned sometimes it's just best to go along with her ideas, at least with Phil around nothing should go too horribly wrong.

"Great!" She bounces and claps her hands together, reminding me slightly of Alice. "Phil, turn off the television and call the restaurant. See if they can get us in around six."


End file.
